Hey everyone! Sorry I’ve gone on hiatus unexpectedly. School started, GW2 launched, and I got lost in both! Plus, I had something rather unexpected happen to me.
It’s going to be a little bit serious, so if you’re not into the seriousness and want to preserve the fun, enthusiastic image you have of me, feel free to skip this post.
So I’ve recently had a bout of depression that lasted a little longer than I wanted it to and went a little darker than it has in the past. A lot of times we don’t think that there are real people behind the avatars so it’s odd for us to talk so freely about stuff like this. I understand this subject can be a little touchy, but I’m going to tackle it head on, like I always do.
My depression went to some pretty dark places, darker than I’m really used to and I’m rather surprised it went there. The only thing that really kept me from going completely under was Guild Wars 2. All I have been doing for the past week or so is playing GW2 and going to school (when I’m not sick enough where I can’t drive). I’ve done some stuff like watch TV and go online, but I haven’t felt the motivation to do much more than that. Blogging, moderating, etc. has all been out of the question.
Until Tuesday. What changed? I went to my intercultural class with my blue haired, gay instructor. At first, I wasn’t going to go. Then, I wasn’t going to participate. By the end of the class, it felt like a huge fog had lifted from me and I felt a lot better. I already sent him an email about it.
Anyway, I feel 100% better! I feel like my old self again and I went to class with no problems today. I’ve been more active on Twitter, and I think I’m ready to jump right back into moderating as well as writing.
I’d like to take the time, though, to encourage anyone who is dealing with depression to reach out to someone. Me, someone in Guild Wars, anyone. You don’t have to do this alone. I know it’s hard. I was just about to reach out to someone yesterday (tues) when I went to class and that did the trick. If that hadn’t, one of my friends on Twitter would have gotten a DM from me.
Please, please, please don’t fight alone. You don’t have to. Sometimes it feels like you are all alone and no one could possibly care about you or love you. There is at least one person that cares and will listen to you and that’s me. Heck, I’d even give you a hug if I could. Just don’t go it alone. As one of my favorite bloggers, The Bloggess says, “Depression is a lying bastard”. I know it’s hard to believe this when you are going through it, but it will get better. If you need someone to talk to, I’m definitely here for you.
All that being said, I am much better now. I will get back to my regularly scheduled posts. Hopefully I will have one this weekend. I have kind of a lot to cover since the launch. Forgive me for not being on top of all of it, but I don’t ever intend this to be a news site. I figure there are enough of those out there. This is strictly my experiences. I also have a ton of screenshots to go through.
I’m not even joking about that. I’ve filled up my screenshot folder 3 times now. I’m about 700 screenshots into 4 times. If you know how many screenshots you can hold in one folder, it’s 999. Yup. I have around 3700 screenshots. Granted, the first folder is all from the beta weekends and stress tests (for the most part). It’s a tad bit overwhelming. I’ll slog through them, though, because I love you that much. Expect a post this weekend!